There’s a Wolf in my Video!


If you saw my most recent video, Blue Fields from Final Fantasy VIII, you might have noticed that I had a seemingly unconnected prop showing up in some of my clips. If you look close you can see it.

Can you see it?

That is right, my video this week had a special guest, a beanie baby wolf. This wolf is not in this video because of Final Fantasy VIII. It is not there as some kind of prop or joke. It is there because I am a father.

See, my son, who is going to be five this fall, came upstairs while I was recording this video. He ran up to me to tell me that he was going over to his cousin’s house. He gave me a hug and an “I love you.” But then he handed me his stuffed wolf he was holding.

“Dada, I need you to take care of this wolf. He gets lonely and is afraid to be by himself. Can you take care of him?”

I promised my son I would take good care of his wolf while he was gone. He smiled, gave me one last hug and headed back downstairs. See, my son calls all his stuffed animals his babies. He is their caretaker, and he takes this particular type of play very seriously. He makes them food and medicine when they are sick and helps comfort them when they get scared. He sees that some of the most important parts of life are taking care of those you love, and he wants so badly to emulate that. So, being given the job of protecting a baby who is afraid of being alone was serious business. And I wanted my son to know that I took it seriously.

So, from that point on, my new friend, the wolf, helped me make the video. Since he didn’t want to be alone, he decided to be with me as I filmed all of my parts. You can see him most clearly hanging out on my lap while I play acoustic:

Nested Sequence 06.00_01_15_21.Still001

“He gets lonely and is afraid to be by himself. Can you take care of him?”

And he was right there, watching me program my LSDj parts into the Gameboy:

Lead 2.00_00_23_18.Still001

He makes them food and medicine when they are sick and helps comfort them when they get scared.

He even helped me put together my synth patches on the prophet 08:

being given the job of protecting a baby who is afraid of being alone was serious business.

being given the job of protecting a baby who is afraid of being alone was serious business.

I want my son to know that his priorities are my priorities. Even though I spend a lot of time making music, I will include his lonely wolf in what I am doing, because my son cares about that and that makes it important to me. I even will play into it, and tell him how the wolf helped make me feel less nervous in front of the camera and that he helped me make the patches on my synths.

I did this because I remember being a kid. I remember playing pretend. I remember that my parents always played along, and how happy it made me. I remember how seriously I took those games. I also see how important it is to my son. You might see a silly kid, playing make believe with some dated stuffed animal collectables his parents still had from when they got way too into beanie babies, but I see a future father, trying to be like his Mama and Dada, taking care of his babies. That is the kind of play I want to support. Not to say I won’t play along when he wants to sword fight, because I totally do that too. I love playing with this kid.

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Normally, my son isn’t super attached to my videos (unless they are from Minecraft) but when I told him that his wolf helped me make the video, we immediately had to watch it. He was so happy to try to find the wolf in every shot. I know that this video will be one of his favorites of mine, all because I put a stuffed animal on my lap while recording guitar.

I wrote this because I wanted to let you all know about the most important person in my life and how sometimes, there will be wolves in my videos. Because I love my son and I want him to know that his Dada cares. If you want to read more about our families adventures, you should check out my wife’s blog.

Up on my headstock. Can only see if you freeze on a few frames.

Up on my headstock. Can only see if you freeze on a few frames.

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